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Load Load


Load   Load
  Release Date:
June 1996
  Released by: Elektra Entertainment Group
  Produced by: Bob Rock with Hetfield & Ulrich
  Recorded at: The Plant Studios, Sausalito, California,
  May 1995 - Feb 1996
  Chart Position: #1 (USA), #1 (UK)
  Album Sales: 5 million (USA)

Line Up:

James Hetfield - Rhythm Guitars, Vocals
Kirk Hammett - Lead Guitar
Jason Newsted - Bass
Lars Ulrich - Drums

Tracks (Song Titles link to the Lyrics):

1. Ain't My Bitch (5:04)
2. 2x4 (5:28)
3. The House Jack Built (6:39)
4. Until It Sleeps (4:29)
5. King Nothing (5:28)
6. Hero Of The Day (4:21)
7. Bleeding Me (8:19)    
8. Cure (4:54)
9. Poor Twisted Me (4:00)
10. Wasting My Hate (3:57)
11. Mama Said (5:19)
12. The Thorn Within (5:51)
13. Ronnie (5:17)
14. The Outlaw Torn (10:48)

Singles:

Until It Sleeps
Hero of the Day
King Nothing
Mama Said
Bleeding Me (Promotional)
Ain’t My Bitch (Promotional)

Music Videos:

Until It Sleeps
King Nothing
Hero of the Day
Mama Said

Awards:

American Music Award for Until It Sleeps (Favorite Metal/Hard Rock Song)
MTV Music Video Award for Until It Sleeps (Best Metal Video)

Album Notes:

The cover of the album is original artwork entitled “Semen and Blood III.” It is one of three photographic studies by Andres Serrano created in 1990 by mingling the artist's own semen and bovine blood between two sheets of Plexiglas.

The Outlaw Torn is one minute shorter on original album version as Metallica went over the 80:00 limit on CD's and had to shorten the song to fit everything on a single CD. The 10:48 full version can be found on one of the Memory Remains singles.

Kirk: “Some of the tracks that are a departure from anything we've ever done show what we've been listening to for the past five years--like me being a total jazz and blues guy now. The blues influence is pretty evident. The jazz influence is more subtle, more in my phrasing than anything else. Of course, James listens to a lot of country, and we all listen to tons of late-70s hard rock. We've not been afraid to let that side of us show--after all, all our roots are in late-70s stuff like UFO, Deep Purple, Sabbath, Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Thin Lizzy.”


Lyrics and Song Info Lyrics and Song Info


AIN'T MY BITCH

It is said that within this song James just wanted to say that “it” (something indefinite) ain’t his problem and to leave him alone.

Outta my way
Outta my day
Out of your mind and into mine

Into no one
Into not one
Into your step but out of time

Headstrong
What's wrong?
I've already heard this song before
You arrived, but now it's time to kiss your ass goodbye

Dragging me down
Why you around?
So useless

It ain't my fall
It ain't my call
It ain't my bitch
It ain't my bitch

Down on the sun
Down and no fun
Down and out, where the hell you been?

Damn it all down
Damn it unbound
Damn it all down to hell again

Stand tall
Can't fall
Never even bend at all before
You arrived, but now it's time to kiss your ass goodbye

Dragging me down
Why you around?
So useless

It ain't my fall
It ain't my call
It ain't my bitch

Outta my way

Outta my way
Outta my day
Out of your mind and into mine

Into no one
Into not one
Into your step but out of time

Headstrong
What's wrong?
I've already heard this song before
You arrived, but now it's time to kiss your ass goodbye
And now it's time to kiss your ass goodbye

Dragging me down
While you around?
So useless

It ain't my fall
It ain't my call
It ain't my bitch

No way but down
Why you're around
No fooling

It ain't my smile
It ain't my style
It ain't my bitch
Oh, it ain't mine

Ain't mine
Your kind
You're stepping out of time

Ain't mine
Your kind
You're stepping out of time

Taking me down
Why you around
No fooling

It ain't my fall
It ain't my call
It ain't my bitch
You ain't mine

TOP

2 x 4

The song is about an unnecessary resort to violence.  2 x 4 was the first Load song to be played live (on the 23rd August 1995 at Astoria II in London, England).

I'm gonna make you, shake you, take you
I'm gonna be the one who breaks you
Put the screws to you, yeah, my way
Yeah, come on and come on, come and make my day
Make my day

Got some hell to pay, I steal your thunder
The joy of violent movement, pulls you under
Bite the bullet, well hard
Yeah, but I die harder, so go too far
Too far

Friction, fusion, retribution
I can't hear you, talk to me
I can't hear you, so talk to me
I can't hear you, are you talking to me?
I can't hear you, are you talking to me?
I can't hear you, time to meet my lord
I can't hear you, talk to two by four

I'm gonna make you, shake you, take you
I'm gonna be that one who breaks you
Put the screws to you, my way
Hey, come on and come on, come and make my day
Make my day

Friction, fusion, retribution
I can't hear you, talk to me
I can't hear you, come talk to me
I can't hear you, are you talking to me?
I can't hear you, are you talking to me?
I can't hear you, time to meet my lord
I can't hear you, talk to two by four

Talk to two by four
It don't take no more

Friction, fusion, retribution
I'm gonna make you talk to me
I'm gonna trick you, so talk to me
I can't hear you, are you talking to me?
I can't hear you, you talking to me?
I can't hear you, time to meet my lord
I can't hear you, talk to two by four
She don't take no more

TOP


THE HOUSE JACK BUILT

The song is about a "house" which represents the only place where a person feels safety and comfort.

Open door, so I walk inside
Close my eyes, find my place
to hide
And I shake as I take it in
Let the show begin

Open my eyes just to have them close again
Well on my way, but on my way to where I've been
It swallows me as it takes me in its fog
I twist away as I give this world the nod

Open door, so I walk inside
Close my eyes, find my place to hide
And I shake as I take it in
Let the show begin

Open my eyes just to have them closed once again
Don't want control
As it takes me down and down and down again
Is that the moon or just a light that lights this dead-end street?
Is that you there or just another demon that I meet?

The higher you are
The farther you fall
The longer the walk
The farther you crawl
My body, my temple
This temple, it tilts
Step into the house that Jack built

The higher you are
The farther you fall
The longer the walk
The farther you crawl
My body, my temple
This temple, it tilts
Yes, this is the house that Jack built

Open door, yes, I walk inside
Swallow me so the pain subsides
And I shake as I take the sin
Let the show begin

The higher you are
The farther you fall
The longer the walk
The farther you crawl
My body, my temple
This temple, it tilts
Yes, this is the house that
Jack built

The higher you are
The farther you fall
The longer the walk
The farther you crawl
My body, my temple
This temple, it tilts
Yes, I am, I am, I am

Open my eyes
It swallows me
Is that you there
I twist away
Away
Away
Away

TOP


UNTIL IT SLEEPS

The song was an instant radio hit and marked Metallica's further departure from their previous thrash metal style into the realm of more alternative rock sounding music. The song itself is about cancer and how it killed both of Hetfield's parents. Being of the Christian Science faith, neither of James’ parents sought out medical treatment; believing that faith and God would heal them. Eventually, both of Hetfield's parents succumbed to cancer.

Where do I take this pain of mine?
I run, but it stays right by my side

So tear me open, pour me out
There's things inside that scream and shout
And the pain still hates me
So hold me until it sleeps

Just like the curse, just like the stray
You feed it once and now it stays
Now it stays

So tear me open but beware
There's things inside without a care
And the dirt still stains me
So wash me until I'm clean

It grips you, so hold me
It stains you, so hold me
It hates you, so hold me
It holds you, so hold me
Until it sleeps

So tell me why you've chosen me
Don't want your grip,
don't want your greed
Don't want it

I'll tear me open, make you gone
No more can you hurt anyone
And the fear still shakes me
So hold me until it sleeps

It grips you, so hold me
It stains you, so hold me
It hates you, so hold me
It holds you, holds you,
holds you until it sleeps

I don't want it

So tear me open but beware
There's things inside without a care
And the dirt still stains me
So wash me till I'm clean

I'll tear me open,
make you gone
No longer will you hurt anyone
And the hate still shapes me
So hold me until it sleeps
Until it sleeps

TOP


KING NOTHING

The song is about people who devote their whole lives to earning money until one day, they realize ("then it all crashes down") that all their money has gotten them nothing worthwhile. Instead, they have wasted their entire life in pursuit of money instead of being truly happy (where's your crown, king nothing?). Although the song is disliked by many fans, it shows Metallica’s diversity and creativity in song writing.

Wish I may, wish I might
Have this I wish tonight
Are you satisfied?
Dig for gold, dig for fame
You dig to make your name
Are you pacified?

All the wants you waste
All the things you've chased

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around
Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown,
King Nothing?
Where's your crown?

Hot and cold, bought and sold
A heart as hard as gold
Are you satisfied?
Wish I might, wish I may
You wish your life away
Are you pacified?

All the wants you waste
All the things you've chased

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around
Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name
Where's your crown, King Nothing?
Where's your crown?

I wish I may, I wish I might
Have this wish I wish tonight
I want that star, I want it now
I want it all and I don't care how

Careful what you wish
Careful what you say
Careful what you wish, you may regret it
Careful what you wish, you just might get it

Then it all crashes down
And you break your crown
And you point your finger
But there's no one around
Just want one thing
Just to play the king
But the castle's crumbled
And you're left with just a name

Where's your crown, King Nothing?

Nothing

You're just nothing
Where's your crown, King Nothing?
You're just nothing
Absolutely nothing

Off to never-never land

TOP

HERO OF THE DAY

James wrote this song about people who are looking for heroes within the media and entertainment. The song says that those people searching for heroes do not realize that the people they should be "worshiping" are the people they come across in everyday life.

Mama, they try and break me

The window burns to light the way back home
A light that warms no matter where they've gone
They're off to find the hero of the day
But what if they should fall by someone's wicked way?

Still the window burns
Time so slowly turns
And someone there is sighing
Keepers of the flames
Do you feel your name?
Did you hear your babies crying?

Mama, they try and break me
Still they try and break me

Excuse me while I tend to how
I feel
These things return to me that still seem real
Now, deservingly, this easy chair
But the rocking stopped by wheels of despair

Don't want your aid
But the fist I make
For years can't hold or feel
No, I'm not all me
So please excuse me while I tend to how I feel

But now the dreams and waking screams
That ever last the night
So build the wall, behind it crawl
And hide until it's light
So can you hear your babies crying now?

Still the window burns
Time so slowly turns
And someone there is sighing
Keepers of the flames
Did you feel your names?
Did you hear your babies crying?

But now the dreams and waking screams
That ever last the night
So build a wall, behind it crawl
And hide until it's light
So can't you hear your babies crying now?

Mama, they try and break me
Mama, they try and break me
Mama they try
Mama they try

TOP

BLEEDING ME

Jason explained that to him the song means that it is about a person who is being put through mental torture. The lyrics explain that the song’s meaning is “Don't abuse unless you can take the abuse, or don't dish out what you can't take.”

I'm digging my way
I'm digging my way to something
I'm digging my way to something better

I'm pushing to stay
I'm pushing to stay with something
I'm pushing to stay with something better

I'm sowing the seeds
I'm sowing the seeds I've taken
I'm sowing the seeds I take for granted

This thorn in my side
This thorn in my side is from the tree
This thorn in my side is from the tree I've planted

It tears me and I bleed
And I bleed

Caught under wheels' roll
I take the leech, I'm bleeding me
Can't stop to save my soul
I take the leash that's leading me
I'm bleeding me
I can't take it
Caught under wheels' roll
The bleeding of me
Of me
The bleeding of me

I am the beast that feeds the feast
I am the blood, I am release

Come make me pure
Bleed me a cure
I'm caught, I'm caught, I'm caught under

Caught under wheels' roll
I take that leech, I'm bleeding me
Can't stop to save my soul
I take the leash that's leading me
I'm bleeding me
I can't take it
I can't take it
I can't take it
The bleeding of me

I'm digging my way
I'm digging my way to something
I'm digging my way to something better

I'm pushing to stay
I'm pushing to stay with something
I'm pushing to stay with something better
With something better

TOP

CURE

Simply put, the song is about the wish of getting a cure from a difficult situation.

The man takes another bullet
He keeps them all within
He must seek no matter how it hurts
So don't fool again

He thinks the answer's cold
and in his hand
He takes his medicine
The man takes another bullet
He's been fooled again

Uncross your arms
Take and throw them to the cure, say,
"I do believe"

Uncross your arms now
Take them to it, say
"I do believe"
"I do believe"

The lies tempt her and she follows
Again she lets him in
She must believe to fill the hollow
She's been fooled again

Uncross your arms
Take and throw them to
the cure, say,
"I do believe"

Uncross your arms now
Take them to it, say,
"I do believe"
"Yeah, I do believe"

Betting on the cure
It must get better than this
Betting on the cure
Everyone's got to have the sickness
'Cause everyone seems to need the cure
Precious cure

Betting on the cure
'Cause it must get better than this
Betting on the cure
Everyone's got to have the sickness
'Cause everyone seems to need the cure
Precious cure

"I do believe"

Betting on the cure
It must get better than this
Need to feel secure
It's got to get better than this
It must get better than this
Betting on the cure
Everyone's got to have the sickness
'Cause everyone seems to need the cure

"I do believe"

TOP

POOR TWISTED ME

Many different theories exist as to what the meaning behind this song is, and everyone seems to have their own opinion.

Perhaps this song describes people who deliberately do things to put themselves in a shit position and then use the situation to pity themselves and gain sympathy from others.

Oh, poor twisted me
Oh, poor twisted me
I feast on sympathy
I chew on suffer
I chew on agony

Swallow whole the pain
Oh, it's too good to be
That all this misery
Is just for, oh, poor twisted me
Poor twisted me

Poor mistreated me
Poor mistreated me
I drown without a sea
Lungs fill with sorrow
Lungs fill with misery

Inhaling the deep, dark blue
Oh, woe is me
Such a burden to be
The poor mistreated me

To finally reach the shore, survive the storm
Now you're bare and cold, the sea was warm
So warm, you bathe your soul again

Baby, again and again and again

You finally reached the shore, survived the storm
Now you're bare and cold, the sea was warm
So warm, you bathe your soul again

Good to feel my friend
Oh, woe is me
Such a burden to be
Oh, poor twisted me
Yo, poor twisted me

TOP

WASTING MY HATE

The song is about being tired of wasting hate on anybody.

“Wasting My Hate” was a line that James got from his buddy Waylon Jennings who was sitting somewhere in a diner, and there was another guy outside in a car staring at him. So Waylon stared back with hate, and when he finally had had enough he went out to talk to the guy in the car, only to find out that he was sleeping. He thought “Oh man I've wasted my hate on this guy.” He told James the full story and James liked the line so much that he used it for writing a song about it.

Good day. How do?
And I send a smile to you
Don't waste, waste your breath
And I won't waste my hate on you

Ain't gonna waste my hate
Ain't gonna waste my hate on you
I think I'll keep it for myself

Ain't gonna give no more
Ain't got the time to help you score
I think it's time you pleased yourself
Yourself

Good day. How do?
And I send a smile to you
Don't waste, waste your breath
And I won't waste my hate on you
Waste my hate on you
Hate

You think you're worthy now?
You think enough to even raise the brow
And to laugh and tip that two-pronged crown?

Well I see my hands, I see my feet
I feel that blood that pumps in beat
But where the hell's my mind going now?
Dead gone now

Good day. How do?
And I send a smile to you
Don't waste, waste your breath
And I won't waste my hate on you
Waste my hate on you

Think I'll keep it for myself

Hate

Ain't gonna waste my hate
But I'm so greedy when they say
Better to give than to receive

Ain't gonna waste my hate
Ain't got time to waste my hate on you
I think I'll keep it all for myself
For myself

Good day. How do?
And I send a smile to you
Don't waste, waste your breath
And I won't waste my hate on you
Waste my hate on you

Think I'll keep it for myself

Hate

TOP

MAMA SAID

Several fans accused it of sounding “country” after hearing the steel guitar, which is a mostly country instrument.

The song is a very personal song for James because it is about how he always wanted to distance from his mother until one day she died and he realized that he always took her love for granted.

Mama, she has taught me well
Told me when I was young
Son, your life's an open book
Don't close it 'fore it's done
The brightest flame burns
quickest
That's what I heard her say
A son's heart's owed to mother
But I must find my way

Let my heart go
Let your son grow
Mama, let my heart go
Or, let this heart be still

"Rebel," my new last name
Wild blood in my veins
Apron strings around my neck
The mark that still remains
I left home at an early age
Of what I heard was wrong
I never asked forgiveness
But what is said is done

Let my heart go
Let your son grow
Mama, let my heart go
Or let this heart be still

Never I ask of you
But never I gave
But you gave me your emptiness
I now take to my grave
Never I ask of you
But never I gave
But you gave me your emptiness
I now take to my grave
So let this heart be still

Mama, now I'm coming home
I'm not all you wished of me
A mother's love for her son
Unspoken, help me be
I took your love for granted
And all the things you said to me
I need your arms to welcome me
But a cold stone's all I see

Let my heart go
Let your son grow
Mama, let my heart go
Or let this heart be still

Let my heart go
Mama, let my heart go
You never let my heart go
So let this heart be still

Never I ask of you
But never I gave
But you gave me your emptiness
I now take to my grave
Never I ask of you
But never I gave
But you gave me your emptiness
I now take to my grave
So let this heart be still

TOP

THORN WITHIN

Jason Newsted mentioned that is song is his favorite one from Load. He said that the song is about someone who is guilty and no one is willing to forgive for what he is blamed for and his father just feels as though he is a thorn.

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned
Find me guilty of the life I feel within

When I'm branded, this mark of shame
Should I look down, disgraced, or straight ahead and know that you must blame?

I am the secret
I am the sin
I am the guilty
And I am, I am the thorn within

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned
Find me guilty when true guilt is from within

So point your fingers, point right at me
For I am shadows and will follow you, one and the same are we

I am the secret
I am the sin
I am the guilty
And I am, I am the thorn within

I do your time, I take your fall
I'm branded guilty for us all

So point your fingers, point right at me
For I am shadows and will follow you, one and the same are we

I am your secrets
I am your sin
I am your guilty
And I am, I am the thorn within

I am the thorn within
I am the thorn within

TOP

RONNIE

The song is about a quite kid who one day went to school for a shooting. The lyrics to the song are actually based on a school shooting that occurred in 1995 in the state Washington. The shooter was named Ron Brown (or “Ronnie frown” as written in the lyrics).

Story starts, quiet town
Small-town boy, big-time frown
Never talks, never plays
Different path, lost his way

Then streets of red—red, I'm afraid—
There's no confetti, no parade
Nothing happens in this boring place
But, oh my God, how it all did change

Now they all pray,
"Blood stain, wash away"

He said,
"Lost my way
This bloody day
Lost my way"

I heard it
He said,
"Lost my way
This bloody day
Lost my way"
Oh, please wash away
But blood stained the sun red today

I always said something's wrong
With little, strange Ronnie Long
Never laughed, never smiled
Talked alone for miles and miles and miles

"Gallow calls, son," I say
Keep your smile and laugh all day
Think once again in this boring place
For little boys, how they soon change
And they all pray,
"Blood stain, wash away"

He said,
"I lost my way
This bloody day
Lost my way"
I heard it
He said,
"I lost my way
This bloody day
I lost my way"
Oh, please wash away
But blood stained the sun red today

Well, all the green things died when Ronnie moved to this place
He said, “Don't you dare ask why I'm cursed to wear this face”
Now we all know why the children called him Ronnie Frown
When he pulled that gun from his pocket they all fall down, down, down

He said,
"Lost my way
This bloody day
Lost my way"

Yeah, yeah
I heard it
He screamed,
"Lost my way
This bloody day
Lost my way"

Oh, please wash away
But blood stained the sun red today

All things wash away
And they all fall down
But blood stained the sun today

All things wash away
And they all fall down
But blood stained the sun today

TOP

THE OUTLAW TORN

James said that this song is about “loosing someone to death and longing to find a replacement that never comes.”

Because of the song’s length and position as the final track on the album, the song had to be edited by one minute to fit on Load. If the songs' total passed 78 minutes, 59 seconds, the Load CD would not play perfectly. With the fourteen songs completed, Metallica had recorded thirty seconds too much material. The jam at the end of the song had to be edited out.

“The Outlaw Torn (Unencumbered by Manufacturing Restrictions Version)” can be found on The Memory Remains Part 2 single in its entirety - 10 minutes and 52 seconds.

To this day, The Outlaw Torn remains the longest song Metallica has recorded for a studio album.

And now I wait my whole lifetime for you
And now I wait my whole lifetime for you

I ride the dirt, I ride the tide for you
I search the outside, search inside for you

To take back what you left me
I know I'll always burn to be
The one who seeks so I may find
And now I wait my whole lifetime

Outlaw of torn
Outlaw of torn
And I'm torn

So on I wait my whole lifetime for you
So on I wait my whole lifetime for you

The more I search, the more my need for you
The more I bless, the more I bleed for you

You make me smash the clock and feel
I'd rather die behind the wheel
Time was never on my side
So on I wait my whole lifetime
Outlaw of torn
Outlaw of torn
Outlaw of torn
And I'm torn

Hear me
And if I close my mind in fear
Please pry it open
See me
And if my face becomes sincere
Beware
Hold me
And when I start to come undone
Stitch me together
Save me
And when you see me strut
Remind me of what left this outlaw torn

TOP